- You don’t have to achieve great things by the time you’re 25
- You have intrinsic value above and beyond your perceived utility to other people and society at large.
- You don’t have to have sex, or have sex in any way that you find uncomfortable or unpleasant, to keep anyone’s love or good opinion of you. They didn’t love you or think very well of you to start with if they demand it.
- You don’t have to stay with someone who isn’t meeting your emotional or sexual needs because they need you, or you’ve been with them for awhile, or you need to be in a relationship. You need you. Your time is your own and it is finite.
- It’s ok to work at a job you enjoy that doesn’t make you miserable even if it’s not a career and it won’t “lead to anything.”
- Your life is not a narrative. It is not leading to anything, there is no overarching thesis, it does not have themes beyond the usual shared cultural experiences of your time and place. This is ok. It does not mean that your life is without purpose or meaning.
- It’s ok not to like or get along with the vast majority of people you encounter, so long as you afford them the same respect, courtesy and dignity that they afford you.
- Expensive is not always better.
- Failure is temporary if you’re still alive.
- People are both much better and much worse than you’d suspect, but usually not all at once.
- Stop thinking of your future self as a different person and it will be easier to prevent money and health problems.
- Let people help you, lean on them when you need to, and be available to help, but don’t swing too far in either direction. Try to carry your half of the life basket as evenly as you can.
- Set boundaries, and do not be afraid to kick people out of your life who disregard them. You will not end up alone and unloved. People who love you will be ok with your boundaries.
- Your power does not come from money or beauty, but from seeing life steadily and wholly, from a curious and thoughtful mind, and from your ability to say no when you want to, and yes when you want to, and I don’t know when you don’t know.
- There will be bad times, maybe lots of bad times, but not only bad times.
- Love will not heal the wounds in your soul, but love can give you the impetus to begin the work of healing yourself.
- Life might be a long series of starting over, and that’s alright.
- You’re really cool, you’re really beautiful, you’re really special. Really. Not to everyone, but to a lot of someones sometimes.
my favorite type of people on tumblr
- people who tag their asks/replies with your url
- people who tag what they post (if they’re multifandom)
- people who tag their spoilers
- people who tag all the shit i don’t like
- people who use tags the right way
- people who tag nice things about your edits
- people who tag nice things about anyones edits
- basically people who tag
Numbers that don’t define you:
- The amount of pounds you weigh
- The circumference of your waist
- The number of people you’ve had sex with
- Your age
- The number of scars on your body
- How many calories you ate today
- Your GPA
- The amount of money in your wallet
Numbers that do define you:
- The number of Pokemon in your Pokedex.
25 Things To Do Before You Turn 25
1. Make peace with your parents. Whether you finally recognize that they actually have your best interests in mind or you forgive them for being flawed human beings, you can’t happily enter adulthood with that familial brand of resentment.
2. Kiss someone you think is out of your league; kiss models and med students and entrepreneurs with part-time lives in Dubai and don’t worry about if they’re going to call you afterward.
3. Minimize your passivity.
4. Work a service job to gain some understanding of how tipping works, how to keep your cool around assholes, how a few kind words can change someone’s day.
5. Recognize freedom as a 5:30 a.m. trip to the diner with a bunch of strangers you’ve just met.
6. Try not to beat yourself up over having obtained a ‘useless’ Bachelor’s Degree. Debt is hell, and things didn’t pan out quite like you expected, but you did get to go to college, and having a degree isn’t the worst thing in the world to have. We will figure this mess out, I think, probably; the point is you’re not worth less just because there hasn’t been an immediate pay off for going to school. Be patient, work with what you have, and remember that a lot of us are in this together.
7. If you’re employed in any capacity, open a savings account. You never know when you might be unemployed or in desperate need of getting away for a few days. Even $10 a week is $520 more a year than you would’ve had otherwise.
8. Make a habit of going outside, enjoying the light, relearning your friends, forgetting the internet.
9. Go on a 4-day, brunch-fueled bender.
10. Start a relationship with your crush by telling them that you want them. Directly. Like, look them in the face and say it to them. Say, I want you. I want to be with you.
11. Learn to say ‘no’ — to yourself. Don’t keep wearing high heels if you hate them; don’t keep smoking if you’re disgusted by the way you smell the morning after; stop wasting entire days on your couch if you’re going to complain about missing the sun.
12. Take time to revisit the places that made you who you are: the apartment you grew up in, your middle school, your hometown. These places may or may not be here forever; you definitely won’t be.
13. Find a hobby that makes being alone feel lovely and empowering and like something to look forward to.
14. Think you know yourself until you meet someone better than you.
15. Forget who you are, what your priorities are, and how a person should be.
16. Identify your fears and instead of letting them dictate your every move, find and talk to people who have overcome them. Don’t settle for experiencing .000002% of what the world has to offer because you’re afraid of getting on a plane.
17. Make a habit of cleaning up and letting go. Just because it fit at one point doesn’t mean you need to keep it forever — whether ‘it’ is your favorite pair of pants or your ex.
18. Stop hating yourself.
19. Go out and watch that movie, read that book, listen to that band you already lied about watching, reading, listening to.
20. Take advantage of health insurance while you have it.
21. Make a habit of telling people how you feel, whether it means writing a gushing fan-girl email to someone whose work you love or telling your boss why you deserve a raise.
22. Date someone who says, “I love you” first.
23. Leave the country under the premise of “finding yourself.” This will be unsuccessful. Places do not change people. Instead, do a lot of solo drinking, read a lot of books, have sex in dirty hostels, and come home when you start to miss it.
24. Suck it up and buy a Macbook Pro.
25. Quit that job that’s making you miserable, end the relationship that makes you act like a lunatic, lose the friend whose sole purpose in life is making you feel like you’re perpetually on the verge of vomiting. You’re young, you’re resilient, there are other jobs and relationships and friends if you’re patient and open.
Found it on facebook and can’t stop making insults xD
Thou artless rude-growing pignut!
Thou mewling fool-born vassal!
Thou gleeking common-kissing hugger-mugger!!
THOU SPONGY MILK-LIVERED BLADDER
THOU PUNY PLUME-PLUCKED HEDGE-PIG
- chubby bunnies
Individual personal blogs;
1. All-or-nothing thinking: Looking at things in black-or-white categories, with no middle ground (“If I fall short of perfection, I’m a total failure.”)
2. Overgeneralization: Generalizing from a single negative experience, expecting it to hold true forever (“I didn’t get hired for the job. I’ll never get any job.”)
3. The mental filter: Focusing on the negatives while filtering out all the positives. Noticing the one thing that went wrong, rather than all the things that went right.
4. Diminishing the positive: Coming up with reasons why positive events don’t count (“I did well on the presentation, but that was just dumb luck.”)
5. Jumping to conclusions: Making negative interpretations without actual evidence. You act like a mind reader (“I can tell she secretly hates me.”) or a fortune teller (“I just know something terrible is going to happen.”)
6. Catastrophizing: Expecting the worst-case scenario to happen (“The pilot said we’re in for some turbulence. The plane’s going to crash!”)
7. Emotional reasoning: Believing that the way you feel reflects reality (“I feel frightened right now. That must mean I’m in real physical danger.”)
8. ‘Shoulds’ and ‘should-nots’: Holding yourself to a strict list of what you should and shouldn’t do and beating yourself up if you break any of the rule
9. Labeling: Labeling yourself based on mistakes and perceived shortcomings (“I’m a failure; an idiot; a loser.”)
10. Personalization: Assuming responsibility for things that are outside your control (“It’s my fault my son got in an accident. I should have warned him to drive carefully in the rain.”)
An on-going list to why NBC’s Olympic coverage is less than sub-par:
- The network edited out the tribute to the victims of the 7/7 terrorist attack in order to show an interview on Michael Phelps from Ryan Seacrest…because clearly the US audience needed that more than seeing a tribute that also included 2 US Servicemen
- There were 11 commercial breaks during the parade of nations alone during the Opening Ceremonies. They also failed to show the first 2 Saudi women to participate in the games for their country even though they mentioned them. They also cut the lesbian kiss that was even shown in some Middle Eastern countries. The commentators seemed to enjoy making back handed compliments and reminding us what countries were at war or having unrest during a time where we should be setting aside politics (and this complaint is coming from a Political Science major).
- The NBC Olympics APP for smart phones, alerts to results hours before they are even shown on NBC
- NBC failed to show Ksenia Afanasyva’s crash and burn during the Women’s gymnastic floor exercise that wrapped up the US team’s gold. Instead they showed Aly Raisman’s warm up where she fell during a tumble pass and asked if the women could deliver the knock out blow…even though they all would have had to fail miserably to lose the gold. They also just happened to leave out the standings.
- They aired an interview with Evander Holyfield and didn’t even realize who they had spoke with.
- There seems to be more commercials during prime time coverage than there is actual coverage of the games.
- The network spoiled swimmer Missy Franklin’s first gold.
- NBC got Guy Adam’s, a journalist for The Independent, suspended after critical tweets.
- They had to pull Doc Emrick and Pierre McGuire to cover Water Polo because it happens to be set up a bit like hockey. Here I thought I had a whole summer before hearing them again.
- The commentary. There is nothing else to add to that.
1. Don’t put drugs in
2. When you see a
womanperson walking by herselfthemself, leave herthem alone.
3. If you pull over to help a
womanperson whose car has broken down, remember not to rape herthem.
4. If you are in an elevator and a
womanperson gets in, don’t rape herthem.
5. When you encounter a
womanperson who is asleep, the safest course of action is to not rape herthem.
6. Never creep into a
woman’sperson’s home through an unlocked door or window, or spring out at herthem from between parked cars, or rape herthem.
7. Remember, people go to the laundry room to do their laundry. Do not attempt to molest someone who is alone in a laundry room.
8. Use the Buddy System! If it is inconvenient for you to stop yourself from raping
womenpeople, ask a trusted friend to accompany you at all times.
9. Carry a rape whistle. If you find that you are about to rape someone, blow the whistle until someone comes to stop you.
10. Don’t forget: Honesty is the best policy. When asking a
womanperson out on a date, don’t pretend that you are interested in herthem as a person; tell herthem straight up that you expect to be raping herthem later. If you don’t communicate your intentions, the womanperson may take it as a sign that you do not plan to rape herthem.
Guys it isn’t only women that get raped, they can do the raping and men can get raped by other men, and women by other women.
Feminists forget that.
I think most people forget that tbh.
10 Myths About Introverts
Myth #1 – Introverts don’t like to talk.
This is not true. Introverts just don’t talk unless they have something to say. They hate small talk. Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in, and they won’t shut up for days.
Myth #2 – Introverts are shy.
Shyness has nothing to do with being an Introvert. Introverts are not necessarily afraid of people. What they need is a reason to interact. They don’t interact for the sake of interacting. If you want to talk to an Introvert, just start talking. Don’t worry about being polite.
Myth #3 – Introverts are rude.
Introverts often don’t see a reason for beating around the bush with social pleasantries. They want everyone to just be real and honest. Unfortunately, this is not acceptable in most settings, so Introverts can feel a lot of pressure to fit in, which they find exhausting.
Myth #4 – Introverts don’t like people.
On the contrary, Introverts intensely value the few friends they have. They can count their close friends on one hand. If you are lucky enough for an introvert to consider you a friend, you probably have a loyal ally for life. Once you have earned their respect as being a person of substance, you’re in.
Myth #5 – Introverts don’t like to go out in public.
Nonsense. Introverts just don’t like to go out in public FOR AS LONG. They also like to avoid the complications that are involved in public activities. They take in data and experiences very quickly, and as a result, don’t need to be there for long to “get it.” They’re ready to go home, recharge, and process it all. In fact, recharging is absolutely crucial for Introverts.
Myth #6 – Introverts always want to be alone.
Introverts are perfectly comfortable with their own thoughts. They think a lot. They daydream. They like to have problems to work on, puzzles to solve. But they can also get incredibly lonely if they don’t have anyone to share their discoveries with. They crave an authentic and sincere connection with ONE PERSON at a time.
Myth #7 – Introverts are weird.
Introverts are often individualists. They don’t follow the crowd. They’d prefer to be valued for their novel ways of living. They think for themselves and because of that, they often challenge the norm. They don’t make most decisions based on what is popular or trendy.
Myth #8 – Introverts are aloof nerds.
Introverts are people who primarily look inward, paying close attention to their thoughts and emotions. It’s not that they are incapable of paying attention to what is going on around them, it’s just that their inner world is much more stimulating and rewarding to them.
Myth #9 – Introverts don’t know how to relax and have fun.
Introverts typically relax at home or in nature, not in busy public places. Introverts are not thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies. If there is too much talking and noise going on, they shut down. Their brains are too sensitive to the neurotransmitter called Dopamine. Introverts and Extroverts have different dominant neuro-pathways. Just look it up.
Myth #10 – Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts.
A world without Introverts would be a world with few scientists, musicians, artists, poets, filmmakers, doctors, mathematicians, writers, and philosophers. That being said, there are still plenty of techniques an Extrovert can learn in order to interact with Introverts. (Yes, I reversed these two terms on purpose to show you how biased our society is.) Introverts cannot “fix themselves” and deserve respect for their natural temperament and contributions to the human race. In fact, one study (Silverman, 1986) showed that the percentage of Introverts increases with IQ.
In response to the post about Asian Americans being reluctant to report domestic violence, there has been an outpouring of resources in both New York and San Francisco. Thanks everyone!
- DRUM (Desis Rising Up and Moving) NYC offers free or low-cost attorney referrals.
- Sakhi is an anti-domestic violence organization that serves women of South Asian descent. Their website also has a listing of other organizations across the US.
- The Korean American Family Service Center has a 24-hour crisis hotline, offers individual and family counseling, provides legal and social service resources for survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault.
- The New York Asian Women’s Center also has a 24-hour (multilingual) hotline, and offers a variety of services from an emergency shelter to programs for children
- The Anti-Violence Project has a hotline for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer and HIV-affected people who need support following abuse, including domestic violence.
- New York Asian Women’s Center (NYAWC)
- Asian American Legal Defense and Education Fund (AALDEF)
- Gay Asian & Pacific Islander Men of New York (GAPIMNY) website seems to be down, also run Downetime
- Q-Wave for queer Asian womenSan Francisco:
- Asian Women’s Shelter: provides 24 hr crisis hotline, case management, shelter, and access to health/legal services. is also inclusive of trans people. they also provide services in 41 languages. AWS provides services for all survivors, not just those of asian descent.
- SFWAR (San Francisco Women Against Rape): women of color centered & women of color led. provides 24 hr crisis hotline, 24 hr medical advocacy and medical accompaniments, peer counseling, case management, other types of advocacy. provides services for all survivors.
- BAWAR (Bay Area Women Against Rape): provides pretty much the same services as SFWAR.
- a list of resources for people in the bay area compiled by oakland sister circle
Dentists are surprisingly some of the first health professionals to see the early signs and symptoms of an eating disorder. An eating disorder depletes its’ sufferer from nutrients and results in hormonal imbalances. Together with vomiting and unhealthy eating habits, this affects the hard surfaces (teeth), the gums and the soft tissues of the mouth.
The signs and symptoms dentists usually see are:
- sensitive teeth,
- enamel erosion on the palatal (inner) side of the upper front teeth,
- discoloured, chipped and worn upper front teeth,
- bleeding gums,
- dry and cracked lips and angles of the mouth (due to Iron, Folate and Vitamin B deficiencies),
- burning mouth,
- dry mouth,
- enlarged parotid glands (in front of the ears),
- raised fillings where teeth have been dissolved away.